Meet the new Sugar Pine 7.

Meet the new Sugar Pine 7.


(Bike repairman) I’ve been doing this 15 years, ok? I plan on doing it another 15 ’til the day I die. Which is June 4th, 2033. I’ve seen it. Forget about all that. Now you came in here, and I don’t know what you did to this, but you came in here looking for a miracle, What you’ll get is the truth. There ain’t nothin’ to be done for your bicycle. (Steve) Shit, okay. No, that’s fine, I just… Really though, there’s nothing, absolutely, that you could do for it? (Bike Repairman) Look into my eyes! You talk to me like that again I will cut you down until there’s nothing left. Your bicycle’s beyond repair. (Steve) No, I get that. (Bike Repairman) No, you don’t. (Steve) No, I definitely, I definitely do get it. (Bike Repairman) Yeah, well I said you didn’t. (Steve) Okay. I don’t get it. (Bike Repairman) You don’t. (Steve) I don’t get it. (Bike Repairman) You don’t get it! (Steve) I know I don’t. (Bike Repairman) Yeah, you don’t! The bicycle’s beyond repair! Next time you come in here, you bring me a bike I can fix. Don’t you ever embarrass me in front of my son again. (Rupert) You got no right doin what you did to my Pa, you sick son of a bitch! No right whatsoever, you hear me? You… you’re so ugly. (Bike Repairman) Yeah. [ Steven mumbling ] So ugly okay, yeah – (Rupert) Think about that and reflect. (Steve) Ok (Rupert) You thinkin’ ’bout it? (Steve) Yeah. (Rupert) I bet you are! (Steve) I am. (Bike Repairman) I bet you are. (Steve) Cool. (Steve) Father-Son shop? (Bike Repairman and Rupert) Yeah. (Steve) How long you guys been in business? (Bike Repairman and Rupert) 25 years. (Steve) 25 years? I thought you said- (Bike Repairman) My father, then me, then him. Then Rupert one day. (Steve) Oooh. You’re gonna own the business soon. (Bike Repairman) Of course! (Rupert) The FUCK you think this is? (Steve) So you’re born in to it. Dad: It’s called a family business, dipshit. (Steve) What’s the chance I can just buy… that bike. [ Bike Repairman laughs ]
(Steve) Please, I’ll buy it. can I just buy that bike. [ Bike Repairman laughs ] (Steve) Please, I’ll buy it. (Bike Repairman) Look, the ugly man wants to buy a bike! (Rupert) Don’t take too kindly to this, Pa. Let’s ice this fool right here where he stands. (Bike Repairman) Oh yeah, no no no that’d be too easy. You stay put right here, I’ll, uh, go back and get my scythe. (Rupert) Oooooh you gonna regret talkin that mess to my daddy. When you see that cold steel stare you dead in the eyes. [ Bike Repairman: whispers ] Cold steel. Dead in your little brown eyes. (Steve) Did you say, “Ice this fool”? Do you know what that means? Have you heard of Central LA? And you don’t know what that means. Do you watch, like, game – gaming videos on Youtube, or… Okay. So you… Do you watch, like, gaming videos on Youtube, or… (Rupert) What of it if I did? (Steve) Well, I don’t know, I, I could introduce you to, like, Bruce Gre- (Rupert) FUCK BRUCE GREENE. (Steve) How’d you know I was gonna say Bruce Greene. (Rupert: Whispers) I felt it. (Rupert) PA, HE’S MAKING OFF WITH A BIKE IN FRONT OF MY VERY OWN EYES! I think that’s a smart move on my part. (Bike Repairman) Cut my goddamn dinger off, Rupert! (Rupert) PA, HE’S TAKING OFF WITH A BIKE IN FRONT OF MY VERY OWN EYES! (Bike Repairman) AHH, Son of a bitch! (Bike Repairman) Cut my damn dinger off, Rupert! (Rupert) Pa, I’m at a crossroads. Do I help you or do I apprehend this man. (Bike Repairman) There’s blood everywhere! All over my skivvies! (Bike Repairman) MotherTitBag! TRACK: Crimson and Clover by Tommy James and The Shondells ♪♪♪ ♪♪ when she comes walking over ♪♪ ♪♪♪ ♪♪ Now I’ve been waitin’ to show her ♪♪ ♪♪♪ ♪♪ Crimson and clover, over and over ♪♪ ♪♪♪ (Steve Voice/Over) It’s the start of a new year. And this year started off just as I’d hoped. Surrounded by good friends. Doing what we love the most: biking. [Yawns] (Steve V/O) Everyone from the office is on break, So I’ve been toiling around LA, passing the time, until they get back. But, I’ll tell ya, with this group right here.. It’s like Cib, James, and Autumn.. Aren’t even gone. TRACK: LA 80s TV Series 1: Magnus Rignblom [ Gross cough ] (Steve V/O) Since I’m always cooped up in the office, It’s interesting to get out into the real world and hear other people’s perspective’s about Sugar Pine 7. Once in a while, people mention things I hadn’t even considered.. [ Weird accent] (Steve V/O) I could tell, by the look on Jordan’s face, that Peter had shown him.. [ Sighs ] His “Plague Vial”. Which I specifically remember telling him: “Do not bring any diseases! Do not ruin this for me!” [ Sad guitar music ] (Steve V/O) If only I had known then, what I knew now.. (Steve V/O) I was worried Peter might take this the wrong way, me kicking him out. But, I’d say, surprisingly he took it in stride. [ Pathetic sobbing ] ♪♪♪ TRACK: Should I Stay or Should I Go by The Clash (Steve V/C) You know, it’s only been a few days, but it felt like an eternity waiting for Cib, James, and Autumn to come back from break. Now sure, I was having fun, but it just not.. quite the same. They probably would’ve loved Peter. And who knows, maybe we would’ve gone into business together, selling stolen diseases from the CDC. Who knows. What I do know, is, that these friends are.. a different breed. But not all friends are the same. Some tell you to sell a business. Others sell diseases.. and regurgitate quotes every sentence. And if Peter were here right now, I imagine he’d say something along the lines of: “Speak of the Devil, and he shall appear.” ♪♪♪ ♪♪Should I stay or should I- ♪♪ Outro: OH NO DUDE!

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